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Young children's meltdowns, freak-outs and volcanic tantrums can challenge the resources of any parent. Age-old parenting logic has always dictated “Behavior First, Consequence Second,” advising parents to reside in a primarily reactive mode. But the newest brain science teaches that proactive parenting can create a whole new dance. When parents understand developmental origins of challenging behavior, their responses diffuse conflict rather than fuel it. And when parents provide emotional coping assistance and skill building, the need for consequences and punishment plummets. These are the pr
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